When Darkness is your Closest Friend

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Back when I was overweight, I also struggled with depression frequently.

I had my “I am depressed” routine:

  • Dark room
  • Negative thoughts
  • Messy house
  • Ignored bills
  • Neglected self care

But when God said to me, “It is not supposed to be this way,” I had a choice:

My answer to both questions was “Yes!” I chose to believe God’s word and that is when my whole life changed.

In John 6:63, Jesus says,

It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh profits nothing. The words that I speak to you are spirit, and they are life.”

If you struggle with negative emotions and habits frequently, then you too can “come into the light.”

What God has done for me, He can do for you.

Several years ago, I had a vision of how I used to be when I struggled with obesity, depression, and food addiction.

I saw myself huddled in a dark corner and God bathed in light just behind me. I sensed He was calling me to Himself, yet voices were whispering to me that it was safer in the darkness.

But God’s love was so strong that I felt compelled to follow Him.

God’s love is what drew me to change, not misery nor self condemnation. I decided I wanted a better life than the one I was living.

God loves you too but just like me, you are the only one who can make the decision that you want to live differently.

No one else can do it for you.

Over the years, I have discovered that there are people who are happy being miserable. They may get attention and sympathy from others because of their misery.

Those who have a victim mentality believe the lie that they cannot change. And part of them does not want to change because misery is all they know.

Deep down, they see misery as safe because they know what misery feels like and they are afraid of the unknown.

But God did not create us to live in misery. He created us to live in joy, no matter what we experienced in our past or outward circumstances in the present.

He has great plans for us, plans to prosper us and not to harm us, to give us hope and a future (see Jeremiah 29:11)

In fact, He gives us a promise and offers us an exchange for misery in Isaiah 61:3:

“To console those who mourn in Zion, To give them beauty for ashes, The oil of joy for mourning, The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; That they may be called trees of righteousness, The planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified.”

Here is the exchange:

  • If you are mourning, God gives you Consolation and the Oil of Joy
  • If your life is in ashes, God gives you Beauty
  • If you have a spirit of heaviness, God gives you the garment of Praise

Are you willing to believe Him and make the exchange? Jesus did not die so that you could live pre-occupied with your past, your shortcomings, and in the pursuit of gratifying your flesh.

You are called to be a tree of righteousness, the planting of the Lord that He may be glorified.

Not only that, but 1 Peter 2:9 reminds you even more of who you really are and what you are called to do:

But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light;”

Did you get that? According to God’s word, you are:

  • A chosen generation (you were created for such a time as this)
  • A royal priesthood
  • A holy nation
  • God’s own special people

Because this is your identity through Jesus Christ, then you were called to proclaim His praises because He has called you out of darkness and into His marvelous light.

But how will you proclaim His praise when you continue to make darkness your friend? You are called to walk in the light as He is in the light.

So how do you do that? There are two guidelines from the scriptures:

“The night is far spent, the day is at hand. Therefore let us cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armor of light (Romans 13:12).”

The first step is to renounce your friendship with darkness. Repent of any wrong thinking that has set up a stronghold in your mind. Repentance starts with an attitude of your heart.

It is agreeing with God that you believe His word above your feelings. You will no longer worship at the altar of your feelings.

You will instead be diligent each day to meditate on His word and trust that in time, your feelings will have an extreme makeover!

Just as physical food is designed to give you physical strength, so God’s word is designed to give you Spiritual strength. With that Spiritual strength, you will be able to handle whatever the enemy tries to throw at you.

In addition, you spend time with God in prayer. His presence is like your water – you can’t live Spiritually without that!

Be honest with God and yourself through prayer. In doing so, you expose the works of darkness into the light. There is an old saying that the strength of sin is secrecy.

How well I know! I used to eat “normal” in front of others and binge in secret.

To stop that, I needed to protect myself from those foods that trigger binges and eat foods that helped me feel emotionally stable. In that way, I could live with integrity – acting the same way whether I was with others or alone.

So be transparent about what you are doing, tell yourself the truth, and stop justifying why it is okay that you continue to live in darkness.

Luke 8:17 says,

For nothing is secret that will not be revealed, nor anything hidden that will not be known and come to light.”

Your challenge today is to live in the light of God’s love and order your thinking according to God’s word.

1 John 1:5 declares:

This is the message which we have heard from Him and declare to you, that God is light and in Him is no darkness at all.”

Be Blessed with Health, Healing, and Wholeness,

Kimberly Taylor

Author of the Take Back Your Temple program

P.S. Do you struggle with overeating sugar? If so, you are not alone!

Overcoming sugar addiction was a key factor on my weight loss journey; I lost 85 pounds and dropped from a size 22 to an 8.

In our 14-day Sugar Detox Challenge online course (inside the Take Back Your Temple program), you’ll get the same success strategies and support to gain peace in your eating habits and achieve lasting weight loss.

Click here to learn more about the Take Back Your Temple program.

“Prayer for Weight Loss”

About the author 

Kimberly Taylor

Kimberly Taylor is a certified Christian life coach and has a heart to help others struggling with emotional eating and weight loss. Once 240 pounds and a size 22, she can testify of God’s goodness and healing power to overcome. She lost 85 pounds as a result of implementing techniques to overcome emotional eating and binge eating disorder.

Kim is the author of "The Take Back Your Temple Program," which teaches Christians how to take control of their weight God's way and the books "The Weight Loss Scriptures" and "The Weight Loss Prayers."

Kim has been featured in Prevention Magazine, Charisma Magazine and on CBN’s 'The 700 Club' television program.

  • Thank you, Kimberly, for sending this to me. These words and the Words of our Lord has spoken to me. I no longer want to hide in darkness, but run to the light of God. Each time the enemy tries…I will put him in his place, for I am a child of God. Jesus is my Savior.

  • These words are so soothing to my soul. You get right down to the heart of the matter and continually remind us of God’s truth. Thank you!

    • That makes me smile, Robin. The Lord always reminds us to come out of darkness into His marvelous light!

  • Thank you Kimberly! I don’t know if you are still following this page, but, in case you are I wanted to thank you for your words are very helpful.

    I know the mind and thoughts can truly be our own self created demons when we replay the past, old guilts, self pity, the future — instead of the current moment with God by our side. It is hard to keep the mind at bay and trust in God when our world situation “seems” overwhelmingly difficult.

    Unemployed, out of money, rent and bills overdue, and alone; so I am needing help in ignoring those negative mind/thought demons and focusing on God’s love and hope.

    You were there to bring meaning to the right scriptures for me today. I pray your journey keeps you in the joy of God’s goodness and helping others find the way.

    Suzanne

    • Praise God, Suzanne – I pray the Lord send you a job and supply all your need according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus according to His promise! Thank you for sharing that testimony.

  • Thank you Kimberly. You hit the nail on the head. I have RA and have gained 20 pounds in the last 2 years. I am on steroids which make me hungry all the time. The Lord has convicted me of my gluttony (eating even when I am not there, eating too much, making bad food choices, etc). I, too, eat in secret. I did so well yesterday, but today, while running errands by myself, I ate a whole bag of nacho chips. I had to go out of my way to go by the store to get them. I think part of the reason why I do this is because I am rebelling against a controlling husband, who calls me fat and tries to control what I eat. I know I am only hurting myself and I truly do want to want to eat more healthy. I think the enemy is right there, tempting me. I spend 1-2 hours a day in prayer and bible study, and then it happens again. I am so frustrated with myself. what am I to do?

    • Hi Diane – you have my prayers. In reading your message, there are a few things I’d suggest you look at. I have some free prayer classes online and since you say that you spend hours in prayer, you want to be sure that your prayers are in faith. Check out this class: https://takebackyourtemple.com/podcast/prayer-lessons-from-noah-prayer-class/. Secondly, you say that you know that you are reacting to your husband’s words. But your husbands words only have power over you because you choose to allow it. God’s word about you (when you choose to believe them) has final authority – yes, even above your husband’s opinion or your own. I would recommend speaking the following statements out loud until they sink in: https://takebackyourtemple.com/who-i-am-in-christ/. Finally, I suggest checking out RA forums and find out how others who are going through what you are going through deal with the side effects of the steroids. One thing I know for sure – if you are hungry, you are going to eat just about whatever you put in front of yourself. So what are you putting in front of yourself? What better choice could you make in the future when you find yourself running errands? You want to give your body as much nourishment as possible so that you can heal from your condition. Find out which foods can cool the inflammation in your body, which is where RA comes from. God gave us food to heal, energize, and nourish our bodies. When you eat the foods He created most often you will experience greater healing in your body. God bless you!

  • This is/was me. It stung to read the part about wanting to share our misery and reap sympathy. That is me. I am angry that I allow things to stay as they are and I haven’t done much to change my circumstances. I was driving home the other day and read a church sign which stated: “What you tolerate you will not change.” That is me to a tee. So, I have decided that I will take June 2015 to fast from empty calorie foods to see how my body feels and functions. Yesterday, I actually turned away from soda, cookies, and candy when I got upset about something. I would like to ask that all who are willing pray for me. I am trying to include exercise but haven’t. My goal is 20 minutes a day for this month. After this month, I want to increase my 20 min. to 30 or more and continue to limit my intake of empty calories.

    Thanks for the posts. They really are right on target for me. It is true thast the truth will set you free, if you listen and allow it to.

  • Thank You!! Thank You!! Thank You!, Your words really touch me today and has open my eyes to begin to see the God’s light in my sea of darkness. I didn’t know I was in darkness. I go church, I pray daily, and continue to do my daily chores and activities. I didn’t know I was depressed until I read your words-struggled with obesity, depression, and food addiction. I saw myself huddled in a dark corner and God bathed in light just behind me-. That when I saw ME!! This is ME!!! right now. And your word to repent from negative thinking. That’s me too!! I will practice and follow your steps for leaving darkness behind and I do believe God will honor my faithfulness. Thank you so much, I am just so full right now.

  • Kimberly Taylor,
    You have done it again! You have put God’s Word into action! To be truthful, I often find it hard to read God’s Word and see how to apply it. I know I am supposed to shine God and shine Jesus as a Christian so that others may see and come to the Lord, but I get so down in the dumps about reading the Word and then my lack of -and lack of knowledge of how I can be- living (applying) the Word. I recently finished up a lot of work and now have time off. As I began thinking about my circumstances, my freedom, my potential for success, and how to get “back on the wagon”, all these little negative thoughts kept cropping up until I put myself in a really dark place. I keep trying to “clean out my Temple” and make it a holier place with great eating, exercise, and prayer plans, and can’t get a good foot-hold on the path I know God has placed before me. I have been in such a dark place for a long time. God doesn’t want that however, and I want to live my life for Him and His Glory! Thank you for using Scripture which invites us to come out of the dark and into God’s light! You have written in such a way that is helping me comprehend all the way down to my core, to come out of the dark and back into God’s and the Lord’s light! Thanks, and God Bless you! -Stephanie

  • I am so thankful for this article. What really caught my attention was “Repent of any wrong thinking that has set up a stronghold in your mind. Repentance starts with an attitude of your heart. It is agreeing with God that you believe His word above your feelings. You will no longer worship at the altar of your feelings. You will instead be diligent each day to meditate on His word and trust that in time, your feelings will have an extreme makeover!”

    I have not been repenting of any wrong thinking.

    Thank you for your wonderful article-as usual! They always speak to me.

    In His Unfailing Love,

    Marla

    • You are welcome, Marla! To clarify, we all have passing dark thoughts, some planted by the enemy. But I mean the negative thoughts that have become strongholds because we refuse to “take every thought captive to the obedience to Jesus Christ” according to 2 Corinthians 10:5. It’s those strongholds we run to again and again for comfort and safety rather than running to the Lord. Such strongholds become like idols to us. To get free, we have to tear those strongholds down and turn our hearts to the Lord. He is the one who is our refuge, a present help in times of trouble. God bless you on this journey!

  • I have tried and tried to purchase take back your temple but paypal stops me everytime ..it does not connect me to a link to be able to purchase once on paypal… I had been trying especially since it was such a great deal at $27.00

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